Tag Archives: friendship

I Want You To

I want you to get under my skin
So I can feel again
Remember a time before
A time before them
A time before tears and confusion
A time before obsession with delusion
A time that we will repeat after now

I want you to get into my head
Whisper softly to allay my fears
To calm my demons
To lull my ghosts to sleep
And resurrect the sweetness
Of pure raw cane sugar
Back to my lips
And back to my tongue

I want to spend long nights
Learning your path
Where you are going
What you’ve grown from

I want you to get under my nails
Like a splinter but better
Like dirt from hard work
Like skin from scratching an itch
Finding a niche
Just so you can stay with me
A little bit longer
After you’re gone
Again

I want you to get into to my heart
Real slow like
So you don’t tear me apart
Infest my dreams
Invade my mind
Make it a slow takeover
So that over time
When we look around
All we see
Is the beautiful path
From you and me
To us.

June 25, 2009

A Walk with You

When I walk down the street
Going anywhere but here
With you on my mind
A poem is formed.

Usually it rhymes
It often makes sense
And sometimes it’s so cheesy
It’s corny
And it’s like my mouth is filled with Nacho Ole Tortilla Chips
Which was my favourite flavour
So it makes me love you more
If love is the accurate word

Love is what you make it
I make it a house for us to live in
Like Angel, I’ll cover you
Stranger that you are
Still unknown to me
I think of you all the time
You haunt me in my dreams
Assuage my nightmares
Both tormentor and comforter
You are my everything
I want you and resist you
Need you and hate you
Cry and laugh with you on my mind.

Thinking of you makes the perfect poems
So perfect they never get written
Lest they be tainted by any other sense
But touch
I feel those poems
Hear them beneath my breath
Only enough to let them make sense
They are kept from air
Lest they be corrupted
By contaminants therein
Though sometimes the contamination’s worth it

They are only fit for your ears
To be whispered softly
Late at night
Only fit for your eyes
To be sealed with a kiss
Ever so gently pressed
Only fit for you
For you were hand selected
Elected worthy of the words I conjure

These words are purposeful and real
A true reflection of thought and heart
I do not lie when I write these words
It would defeat their raison d’etre
Maybe the feeling is fleeting
Short lived or impetuously created
But the sentiment has always been real
And you should believe that I wrote this all
Because when I walk these streets
To anywhere but here
You painted it all in my mind.

April 29, 2009

Mindfield

Proceeding slowly
To defuse this minefield
Of pain
Confusion
And hurt

Swallowing the blasts whole
To save some unwitting
Soul
Some innocent
Passerby

Paying close attention
To the things I control
My actions
My reactions
My words

Making sure not to cut
Not to slash
Not to lash out

Being mindful
That I still care
And to rip you
Would tear me
Apart

But it still hurts
The pain is still fresh
The ache is still deep

…So I lay these minefields again
Defenses
Against the next onslaught
So it can be you now
Who tiptoes on eggshells
Who treads softly
And lightly
Wondering and hoping
You did nothing wrong

I raise these fences
“Protecting”
My heart
From you
While imprisoning
My soul

…I hate what hate does

Again I proceed slowly
To defuse this minefield
Taking tiny steps
While building this gate
Going crazy from this battle posturing

All is not fair
In this war.

Proliferation
and disarmament
A psychotic ebb and flow
Of emotion
Irrational in every way.

Hurt only begets more hurt
Unless someone breaks the cycle.

There’s always going to be pain.

I must do my part
To minimize the damage.

(c) 2009 L. Ashwood

Things I learnt in machine shop

Hard things are strong
Hard to cut
Hard to bend
But hard things break
Make a mistake
And it will shatter
Leaving shrapnel splatter
Everywhere
Go slow as you shape
Take only little pieces away at a time
Take care to lubricate
As you get down on the grind
Go too fast the pieces will fly
At very fatal speeds
Rip through your body
Before you even start to bleed
Heat your metal
And when you cool it slow
it will bend easily to your will
Whichever way you want it to go
But heat your metal
And cool it fast
It will get hard and strong
But can break like glass
Be careful with your material
Temper it well
Pay attention to its sounds
Be aware of the smells

All these things I learnt
Working in the shop
Working with machine,
Chopping metal blocks
But you could learn that too
If you really wanted
Humans and metals are similar
I thought you should know.

April 28, 2009