I remember how much I wanted you Craved you like a meal only grandma could cook Longed for you Like stewed peas with spinners Served over white rice that tastes nicer Than any restaurant could dare make The sweetness of the meat Contrasting the salty of the marrow….
In hindsight I know You didn’t deserve me. But I feel I deserved you– Every bit of joy, But more times than no I feel I deserved every bit of pain;
You spend so much time in silence That it scares you Like the dark– You try to fill it with words and song Clicks and tics, Anything That will drown it out Like running through the house Turning on all the lights
When I look into your eyes I see the sky melted Into tiny pools Of a river deep enough to drown in And it’s hard enough to catch my breath On regular days But you capture me in waves And ripple effects Caused by dimples summoning whirlpools To drag me deeper
I do not wish to be played– But if you must play me, Play me close to your chest Hold me against your body And let your fingers dance across my skin As strings;
Today I force myself to walk away To let go the last strands of cord Keeping your boat at this port
I don’t need you To be soft Just strong enough To tell me